Twenty years is a lifetime in Hollywood. For a rock star and a former "wild child" of the British tabloids, it’s practically several eons. Yet, Amanda de Cadenet and Nick Valensi are still here. They aren't just "still together"—they seem to have actually figured out the thing that most celebrity couples fail at: how to grow up without growing apart.
The unexpected start of Amanda de Cadenet and Nick Valensi
You probably remember the early 2000s. The Strokes were the biggest thing on the planet, basically reviving garage rock single-handedly. Nick Valensi was the quiet, virtuosic guitarist with the perfect hair. Amanda? She was already a legend for a different reason.
She’d been the face of the 90s London "It Girl" scene, hosting The Word and marrying Duran Duran’s John Taylor at just 19. By the time she met Nick in 2002, she was a photographer living in LA, raising her daughter Atlanta, and looking for something a bit more grounded.
Rumor has it they met online. Honestly, in 2002, that was way ahead of the curve. No Tinder, no Raya—just two people finding each other through the digital ether before it was cool.
A secret wedding and a sudden shift
They didn't do the big, bloated celebrity wedding thing. Instead, in July 2006, they headed to the Bahamas for a secret ceremony. It was small. It was private. And it was just months before their lives changed forever.
In October 2006, the couple welcomed fraternal twins, Silvan and Ella.
Nick was 25. He’d spent his entire adult life in a van or on a tour bus. Amanda later told Hello! Magazine that Nick had never even held a baby before his own kids were handed to him. But he stepped up. She described him as the "most involved father" she’d ever seen, bottle-feeding one twin while she breastfed the other.
Why they are the "Muse" and the "Support"
Amanda has often called Nick her "muse." If you look at her 2005 photography book Rare Birds, his face is all over it. There’s an intimacy in those shots that you don’t get from a standard editorial session.
But it hasn't all been effortless glamor and indie rock. Amanda has been incredibly vocal about the "messy" parts of their life. In her book It’s Messy: Essays on Boys, Boobs and Badass Women, she didn't shy away from the realities of postpartum depression.
"I had a complete lack of interest in anything except sleeping," she wrote about the years following the twins' birth.
She admits she was in "survival mode" for nearly five years. That’s the kind of pressure that usually snaps a marriage. Nick stayed. He worked through the "crankiness" and the exhaustion.
The balance of two careers
Nick isn't just "the guy from The Strokes" anymore, though that legacy is untouchable. He launched his own project, CRX, and Amanda was right there, taking the band's press photos.
On the flip side, when Amanda launched #girlgaze, a massive initiative to support female and non-binary photographers, Nick was there at the gallery openings, standing in the back, letting her have the spotlight.
It’s a trade-off.
- Nick tours with one of the biggest bands in the world.
- Amanda builds media empires and interviews people like Hillary Clinton.
- They retreat to a relatively quiet life in Los Angeles.
What most people get wrong about their relationship
People love to label Amanda as a "groupie" or a "rock wife." It’s a lazy take. Honestly, she was famous before Nick was, and she’s built a career that has nothing to do with who she’s married to.
They also aren't the "party couple" people expect. While the 2000s NYC scene was fueled by... well, everything... they transitioned into a lifestyle focused on parenting and creative work pretty early on.
Facts at a glance
- Married: July 2006 (Bahamas).
- Children: Silvan and Ella (Twins, born 2006).
- Total time together: 24 years (as of 2026).
- Key collaborations: Rare Birds (Photography book), CRX (Band photography).
The actionable takeaway for the rest of us
What can we actually learn from Amanda and Nick? It’s not about finding a rock star. It’s about the "muse" dynamic.
If you’re looking to sustain a long-term partnership, you have to be interested in your partner’s evolution. Amanda isn't the same person she was in the 90s. Nick isn't the same guy who recorded Is This It.
How to apply their "success" to your own life:
- Prioritize the "Us" over the "New": They’ve survived the peak of fame by keeping their private life incredibly guarded. If you want something to last, don't post every detail of it.
- Support the Pivot: When Amanda moved from acting to photography to activism, Nick supported the shift. When Nick wanted to sing lead vocals for the first time in his 30s, she was his biggest fan.
- Acknowledge the Mess: Don't pretend things are perfect. Amanda’s honesty about her struggles is likely why they are still standing.
They’ve proven that you can be part of the "coolest" scene in the world and still choose the same person every morning for over two decades. In a world of 72-day marriages, that's the real rock and roll.
To dig deeper into the world of creative partnerships, check out Amanda's photography archives or listen to the technical evolution of Nick's guitar work on The New Abnormal—it’s clear they both keep pushing each other to be better.